California parents have a lot to work out when finalizing matters of divorce. Above all else, you should value your child and how they will react. You should prioritize their mental and emotional well-being.
How does working with a co-parent factor into this? Can cooperation in your personal relationship have a good impact on your child?
Working with your co-parent
Psychology Today talks about ways to break news of divorce to your child. One of the first things experts emphasize is the importance of staying unified with your co-parent. This means being on the same page and working together, not against each other.
How can you do that? One way is by rehearsing all conversations before you have them. Make sure you both know what is off the table for discussion. Allow each other to have an equal amount of time to speak. Do not talk over one another or “compete” for your child’s attention. Do not speak poorly of each other in front of your child.
Staying mindful of your demeanor
Your demeanor also counts. Do not snipe at each other or try to undermine each other during the discussion. Do not argue. You should not even hold a talk after arguing. Your child may pick up on the tense atmosphere and blame themselves.
You can also reduce the trauma your child goes through by working in a collaborative way. Litigation and messy divorces are hard on everyone, including your child. If your divorce is amiable, it does less damage to everyone. Consider these possibilities carefully before you make any lasting decisions about your split.