While you may have a clear purpose for divorcing your spouse, your children may struggle to make sense of their new family dynamic. If unnoticed, the unease your children feel could worsen.
As their parent, you can make a notable impact on their ability to adjust when you supply adequate support. Knowing how to facilitate this adjustment can help you take a proactive approach to care for your children’s unique needs during this unprecedented time.
Regardless of how well you try to hide your uncertainty about the future, your children will recognize that changes have happened. Giving them reassurance can provide comfort, build trust and encourage resilience. According to U.S. News, a common side effect of divorce on children is feelings of abandonment. Studies attribute some of these feelings toward the consequences of ongoing tension between divorced parents.
One way that you can provide reassurance and comfort is through your effort to communicate amicably with your ex. If this is not possible, consider limiting your contact with your ex to the times when your children are not around. Being able to put differences aside and put your children first is one of the best things you go do to show your love.
A challenge for many children of divorced parents is the reality of going back and forth between parents. You may consider collaborating with your ex to establish some common parenting rules, methods and environments to provide your children with some consistency between households.
Whatever your circumstances, focus on the resources you do have that you can use to support your children. Making your home a safe and comfortable place and consistently expressing your love and support may help improve communication and build trust which will both facilitate adaptation.